Family Reunion

Taking your child with special needs to family events can be a little nerve wracking. There are so many things to think about ahead of time and so many things that you can't control. I don't always have the ability to know all the details ahead of time in order to be able to make adaptations or make it more "Tyler" friendly. Some activities really don't work and sometimes we have to respectfully decline ( which I end up making excuses for, like we are busy that day or we have something else planned. It seems I can't just be honest) because there is no way to make the activity enjoyable or physically possible. Physically possible, not just for him but for me. For me meaning I can't carry him that long or I I can't find a way to adapt that activity to him and help him do that activity. He is almost to big for that darn stroller and he is getting to be just to darn heavy.

A few weeks ago we went camping down at my parents house. He LOVED camping. He associates grandpa with camping and fishing so when you mention grandpa, grandpa's house or going out he asks about going fishing. We were invited( do you really have to be "invited" to a family reunion in which you belong!) to the Labrum Family summer get together/reunion.

This year we went to Cold Springs Trout Farm in North Ogden. Because it is a trout farm there is more than plenty of fish for everyone. You pay per fish that you catch. You can't catch and release for the integrity of the ponds and you just have to feed the fish for them to start biting. I was really looking forward to taking Tyler because they had places that kids could fish. He LOVES fishing and carries around his fake ( and his real one if we let him) fishing pole all the time.

My parents were driving up early and had to make a few stops and so I asked my sister if she would like to ride with me. We left in plenty of time to get lost ( but we didn't!) and got there before most of the family. It was really easy to find.

We couldn't hold Tyler and his need to fish back any longer, so we went ahead and got a bucket and a pole ( they offered you a pole at no cost!) and went to town. Aunt Nicky was a trooper and was fine with helping Tyler. A little girl was standing by us and she was feeding the fish and Ty was catching them.

My cute sister.. and Ty's Aunt Nicky Mouse

His face is priceless and he gets so excited. We caught 3 fish quickly and thankfully grandpa and grandma got there soon after and Ty was able to take Grandpa around. Ty was so excited. As soon as he saw grandpa he asked him to go fishing.

My dad helping Ty fish. SEE I told you his face was priceless.

We ate lunch and I was able to visit with my Aunts. I haven't seen all of them for almost 2 years. ( A side note: I LOVE my Aunts. My dads sisters are seriously so great. My Aunt Mary and Aunt Luanne showed up at the hospital after I had Tyler. Though there was no baby for them to see they still came. I always feel welcome with them. They both wanted to know about Tyler, how he is doing and everything inbetween. They were and are so understanding and accepting of Tyler. My Aunt Mary even came up and saw Tyler when he was stuck in a incubator. My Aunt Linda Labrum is such a sweet lady and Oh my Aunt Kaye.. Honestly, there was NEVER a sweeter lady. I LOVE her.) While I was visiting with them Nicky and my dad had walked back down and were fishing. We all walked back to the pond and Ty had caught WAY to many fish ( that you can't throw back) and was laughing so hard as he did it. He was so funny. And everyone else was behind him laughing as we tried really hard to NOT catch a fish. We were relived when the few he got were able to come off the hook. He has the biggest joy of just tossing the pole in the water. ( We have a video so you can see him.)

Thanks mom for the video!!

When you are ready to go you take your fish to the shack there and they gut them and filet them. You pay per fish and it is calculated on the length of the fish. They charge a small fee for the filet but WAY worth it. We ended up spending way to much for the priceless look on his face. But not enough that I didn't mind handing over my card.

It was a great day. It seemed VERY handicapped friendly. It isn't hard to get to the ponds. There is no major hills. It is grass but a wheelchair would easily be able to be maneuvered. You can put up chairs on the grass and sit or just sit on the ground. There is shade and water to drink. You can also bring in your own picnic. You can rent the pavilion for pretty inexpensive. Best of all you get a kid with LOTS of smiles.

*My dad is the fish grandpa and Dallas' dad is the campfire grandpa. We had a campfire there on the 24th and Ty asks all the time for a campfire. Like EVERY TIME we see Grandpa Brown. *

Happy Birthday!

Today is my best friends birthday. He is the MOST amazing best friend a girl could ask for. I honestly feel like I am the most luckiest person in the world. Here are a few reason why I love this man!

He is Tyler's Hero. His best bud. MY best friend.

A protector of all things. His strong arms and hands are always ready to do the protecting.

He has gracefully lived up to the challenge of having a special kiddo. He has learned how to move him, help him and make him be better. Watching him father this special little guy has made my love grow TEN fold.

After shunt surgery placement it was HARD. Tyler was never happy. He was crying all the time. I was losing my patience. This picture captures them perfect. He is so calm, gently and caring no matter what. They have a look about both of them. When they are together my heart skips a few beats.

He is my best friend. My world. And he holds OUR world in his hands. I couldn't ask for a better partner in life than Dallas. I thank my Heavenly Father for giving me Dallas EVERY single day.

Dallas is unselfish. He always has been. He always puts Tyler and I first.

After we moved to Arizona we were solely relying on each other. There were times that he would come home only to work all night to get his business going. In fact he STILL does that. He got a job here in Utah because he was unselfish. He has worked hard enough in the last 4 years of our marriage to keep me home with Tyler. He has put so much extra effort in that he has made a successful business and we ALWAYS have what we need.

Now back in Utah he is even more my best friend. There is not a moment that goes by that I don't miss him when he is gone to work. He is there when I need a hug or a sounding board or a place to vent my frustrations and anger.

He is Handsome. Oh is he handsome. I smile when I look at him. I LOVE his dimples. I love the way he looks at me and smiles. I love when he taps me on the shoulder to smile at something that Tyler is doing. When I look into the eyes of my child, though they are blue like mine the soul is that of Dallas. It is Caring, loving and unselfish to!

He is supportive. His house is looking like a craft store and he NEVER complains because he says it makes me happy. During my Grandfathers funeral he was there holding my hand and giving me comfort when I was sad.

He is an amazing father. Though all circumstances were not in our control when we were in the NICU he has proved time and time again that he is the best father that I could ask for my child(ren). He has proven that he will step out of his comfort zone to be there for me and our child in any way he can.

He trusts me. As a wife and mother he trusts my gut instinct. A few times it has failed us but he never loses that trust in me. He always listens when I say something isn't right.

Most of all he is mine for Eternity. No matter what happens in this life he is mine in the next. He is a strong and worthy priesthood holder in my home. He is loving, caring, sweet, gentle, understanding, protective, a father and a provider and most of all he is mine.

D, I love you so much and hope that you have a wonderful day. I can't thank you enough for traveling this journey with me. I love you... even without lap band :)

An update

My mom "claims" that I don't update but I must confess, I update the most out of all of my sisters/sisterinlaws and even my own MOTHER! So there.

Saturday was a good day. Ty has been getting up several times in the night and coming into our room. He has been doing this off and on for about 6 months. And if we all want to face reality for about 4 years. It makes for a crabby day for mom because I don't get very good sleep from about 3 am on. But he is up for the day bright and early. Yesterday was no exception. We hustled around and picked up the house and hung out. Tyler and I sent Dallas off to the meat store and we moved a few things around in the Garage to finally get a car into it ( which on a side note our 2 car garage doesn't really fit 2 cars. Even with all boxes gone... boo) Ty found a football amidst the boxes and went around the yard throwing the football saying "hike." He would try and get it stuck in the tree in our neighbors yard so he could make the lemons fall down ( like on the super sleuths.)

After Dallas got home Tyler wanted to drive the car. Yes.. He wanted to sit in the car and pretend to drive. So we let him. He put on his seat belt moved and pushed every button and lever and LOVED it.

We went out back and played with a big ball and he threw it around, chased and fell all over the grass and lawn. He loved it and we couldn't get him to come in. Dallas was cooking us dinner on the grill and it was time to eat so we went in. Ty sat on the chair anxiously awaiting his bites of steak. As long as he had ketchup on it he wouldn't care.

After dinner he asked to go back outside in the garage. I wasn't sure why so I opened the door and went about my business. Sure enough he wanted to get in the car. To cute! Dallas sat with him while he was driving and he had a good time!

Throughout the last week I have had a chance to read and reflect on some controversial subjects. One common thing that you hear is I wouldn't change anything about my child. As I have been the care giver of Tyler and have not been able to have respite and it is my responsibility I have decided that I don't like that phrase. My reasoning is that I WOULD change him. Meaning I would change that things are hard for him. That his body doesn't work like he wants it to. He can't express himself. What I WOULDN'T change is his spirit and his personality. That I would never change. BUT I would change that things are hard for him.

Because things are hard for him it takes an emotional toll on everything around us. Ty is a great kid, but he whines and hangs on mom all the time. If he is scared or upset he hangs on mom. If he wants something it is mom. He will literally walk past Dallas to come all the way up stairs to have me do it. I know everyone is thinking it is a mom thing but from what I have seen that tends to slow down a little around 2. His has increased. His dependency on me has increased as I am the only one that can explain what he needs fully. His dad can, but as a general rule I am his care giver and so without his mom he can't express himself or have his needs be met.

Dallas knows that the whining seems to only happen when I am around. It takes a toll on me emotionally. The joys of having him is things I can't or wouldn't want to give up. There are just a million things that I would like to explain better ( without judgment or being negative ) It is something that I am really trying to find a way to do.

Anyway, that is our update. In 24 hours I have a 4 year old so stay tuned for some of our 4 year highlights.

St. Patricks Day events at the Brown household

I truly think people have kids just to do fun things on days like St.Patricks day. Even if the child doesn't really care.

Today we got ready to go to therapy and we got him all dressed in his new little Irish shirt. He could have cared less but I really wanted him to have a good day. Yesterday was such a score for mom. I just wanted to see if I could bring the my baby out to feeling and acting like himself.

There were glimpses of my boy. There is something off with him. I can't tell you what it is but there is that mommy gut that is still telling me something is off. But I digress.

Our St. Patty's day was great. After therapy we came home and got lunch ready for Tyler and Dallas to enjoy. I did some green pigs in a blanket. Tyler loved them. I think this is the first time he has had hot dogs and actually ate them. He ate one full dog and part of another. So proud.


Next Tyler found his frog sprinkler ( Thank you Aunt Chantel) and so we headed out to try it out this year. Its maiden voyage to the front driveway was a hit. And what was an even bigger hit.. just a nice steady stream of water. Along with Ty asking if we could go swimming.





Temper tantrums ensued when he realized we were not going to the pool. I got him undressed outside ( sorry Treslers) and we went into the bath tub for the second time. It seems to be the next best thing.

I made some sugar cookies and made them green. Tomorrow maybe we will frost them and deliver them to our friends and neighbors.

OR maybe we will go to the pool.

I think Ty is shooting for the pool.

Overall it was a good day. So glad I got to spend it with Dallas and Tyler. They are my world.