Saturday, July 23, 2011

Once a NICU mom.....


No matter what there are so many things I think about that are out of the "norm." I half laugh when I catch myself.

1: Grayson was feeling really hot the other day. I went to the drawer and got out the thermometer. I almost took his temperature. Not kidding! Instead I put it back and took a deep breathe and realized that this wasn't normal, he had been sleeping upstairs in the hot room and slowly backed away.

2: I have googled looking for the exact amount of poopy diapers a breastfeed baby should have. I have even clicked on images to make sure it looked EXACTLY like it should.

3: I don't mind taking him out in public if no one is around and we have LOTS of open space. Tomorrow is church and it makes me cringe to think of having people hoover..... How long is to long to wait?

4: I have looked up RSV season start times and times we can all get the flu shot. I am half tempted to require anyone who enters my house to show proof of Pertussis immunity. ( Yeah not kidding. Please family get your pertussis vaccine. And don't come to my house sick.. GOT IT!)

5: I worry about how much is going in to my kid. Not just the amount of time he feeds, the amount he feeds but exactly how many calories. Like I know how many calories and ounce breast milk is. I know how many calories formula is for and ounce. I wonder if we are gaining enough. So much so if the scale wasn't covered in my laundry room and Dallas has been around I probably would have checked to see if we have gained.

Most I worry that he is choking or not breathing. Because there is no bottle at night and it is just me he tends to sleep right next to me. I love it but hate it. There is no monitor telling me he is fine. Nothing but me to make sure he is safe from harms way.

But no worries. His temp is in the normal range... and his calories are looking good :)


Singedwingangel said...

Aww momma I think all of that is perfectly normal. Especially after what you went through before. I can remember when my MIDDLE son, who at the time was the BABY got very ill because of the chicken pox. Going through the trauma something as simple as chicken pox caused was enough to make me say NO MORE KIDS. Ahem.. God had other plans otherwise Middle would never have been middle lol.

Anonymous said...

Hi there--I found your blog from Google. You sound *perfectly* normal! In fact, you sound less rigid than I was! My twin miracles are now five and things have mellowed out here considerably. But I have to give my friends and family props for their support and for putting up with my germaphobia for the first few years.

I'm still first in line for flu shots, but at least I've stopped dumping cream on everything hoping they'll gain weight!

Good job for catching yourself instead of reaching for the thermometer--that shows you're normal yet!