Sunday, February 14, 2010

A National Tragedy Has Occurred!

Dear Uncle/ Doctor Barrett,

A small... NO LARGE national tragedy has occurred at our house. It is in need of a doctor. My mom isn't very good at fixing stuff like this. We have NO idea what we will do.

My best friend Barney is dying. Like REALLY dying. Soon his head will fall off! he is my best friend. I even eat his hand. I dripped wax on his face and mom put him in the bath and there are a few more places that could use a doctors hand.
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His tummy is coming apart, his head is coming off and I am afraid he is going to be come a amputee. If you could give my mom some tips. She doesn't even need to make it look as good as you would do.

Thank you....

Love, Tyler

8 comments:

Nicky said...

Barney needs help!! SAVE BARNEY!

Tammy said...

Barrett only knows how to sew on real people. There is a fine art to sewing on bears, that is perfected by Grandma Labrum who can fix anything with a needle and thread!!!!!

Tammy said...

Lexi can always give it a try if you are really desperate.

Chantel said...

I would use some 5-0 vicryl rapide so it is dissovable. Use a subcutaneous running suture along the lacerations to reduce scaring and help with tension. Make sure all the guts are in place. You may want to use some ketamine for Barney for sedation purposes given his rough condition and extensive injuries. That will be $3000 dollars.
Barrett

Grandma Labrum said...

Barrett, you are so funny! Some how I knew it wasn't Chantel. But, I must say, you don't charge very much. More like $5,000.

Grandma Labrum said...

Just get a curved needle, some strong quilting thread and whip stitch it together. You might want to use needle-nosed pliers to help pull the needle through. You can hide the knot under the skin, won't hurt Barney at all. If you do it when Tyler is asleep, Barney won't know what is happening to him. If Tyler is away, Barney will hear Tyler cry and think he is getting hurt. My advice is free.

Nicky said...

it's official, my brother is a dork. and i need 10% of that for reading it! :)

Kate said...

If you don't want to sew it (which might be the best, most durable option), you could always hot glue in the seams and then press the fabric together. It might be a little stiff, but if the glue absorbs in the fabric, it will be a solid hold.