Endometriosis Awareness- Get comfy :)

Endometriosis Awareness month is in March. Since it is pretty much the Middle of the month I thought I would share my story and my battle. In hopes of helping someone else and , well because it affects so much of what happens to us as a family and how my every day life is impacted.

Back in the day ( like Junior High) when all my friends were getting their period I was the "lucky' one who didn't. 9th grade came and went. Sophomore year came and went. Junior year came and ONE period came. I was 16.

My mom took me to the only OB in the area and we had a few appointments. At the time there wasn't much concern and it came about more like " Here, take these.They will make you have your period."So as a SMART 16 year old I thought " Why would I do that?

Senior year was a period every few months. Nothing like clockwork. Why? I wasn't going to make it come. It was painful. It hurt. It hurt A LOT. At this point I was living in a house with 2 people who had their periods and I was by far the "sickest."

College life started and we decided to go to a doctor in Provo to see if there was something we could do. This is where I met Dr. Anderson. I seriously LOVE this man. He put me on birth control for several years.

In 2001, I was still suffering from weird, painful and horrific pain. Not just during my period but also during other times of the month. I grew a few cysts and things were looking a little more toward needing to diagnosis something else. The only way to diagnosis our next step was surgery.

Dr. Anderson was pretty sure that I had endometriosis. So surgery was scheduled and my first laproscopy was preformed.

At 21 I was officially ( because you have to have surgery to actually GET the diagnosis) diagnosed with Endomtetriosis. I was told that endometriosis can cause infertility and that having babies was usually a cure but getting the babies there was tough. I was told get married, have babies and feel better.

My solution in 2001-2002 was head off on a mission with birth control in hand, ready to take on the world. Instead, I got sicker. Around the end of my mission I knew the birth control wasn't working. So when I got home we tried my first round of depo lupron.

Depo lupron is ROUGH. It is not a pretty drug. I moved to Logan and would drive down after 3 months for my very last shot. And about six months later. We found me BACK in the OR getting my second Laproscopy. This was around October of 2004. Again the joke was to go get pregnant... and get pregnant soon.

By April ( six months) after surgery Dallas and I found out were were expecting a baby. I was using the Nuva ring at the time but apparently either user error or luck we were still expecting.

We had a lot of complications with Tyler. Not just his early birth but we found ourselves in the OB office a few times a month with bleeding and placenta previa. The Placenta previa was found to have "resolved" when we switched OB's right around our 18th week. (While we don't know for sure if that is true it doesn't change our end result. )

When we delivered Tyler at 25 weeks and 3 days it was not "because" of anything. We have an unknown cause of premature delivery. But the delivery was traumatic for not only me but for my body. While having a C-section I had a contraction on Tyler's head so a vertical cut was made on my uterus. I developed blood clots that resulted in my wound having to be reopened and a three week course of a nurse coming 2 times a day to unpack and pack my wound. I ended up on a wound vacuum that would be changed 3 times a week at a wound clinic at LDS hospital. Then I would need reconstructive surgery on the wound because it didn't heal all the way.

All of those things resulted in scaring on the inside of my body known as Adhesion. The more scar tissue you have inside the more hurtful it is. I was put on an IUD and had been off and on birth control along with the IUD for several years after I had Tyler. I also did another six months of Depo lupron at that time.

In March 2008 I went in for my third laproscopy. This one was so nice! I felt so much better. The above mentions adhesion's were really bad. My uterine adhesion had stuck to my sciatic nerve causing pain when I walked. I also had adhesions on my bowels and bladder which they were unable to remove due to the risk that would happen with them touching and removing things in that location.

I had several endometrial spots along with an endometrioma that was taken out. I have since had 2 other enometrioma's that have resolved but are very painful.

In April of 2009 we decided that we really wanted to add another one to our family. Although all was cleared with our perinatologist, as chance would have it, we can't. Because of my endometriosis we have secondary infertility.

December was pretty rough and I found myself with some dysfunctional bleeding. That resulted in yet another round of Depo lupron which has brought us to now.

Having endometriosis has not been the easiest thing for me. Growing up I wanted to have 12 kids. Obviously after our eventful pregnancy with Tyler that wasn't an option but the spiritual, physical and emotional need and want for another child is still there. Yet the physical ability is hindered by having endometriosis.

Though our "trying" only went on a year a ultrasound and pain showed that my endometriosis is back. Because of the condition of my uterus and the adhesion's on it I am not able to have surgery this time. Yes it might make the fertility issues go away, it would also put a child at higher risk.

Another really not nice side effect of having endometriosis is having IBS. Yep. I can tell when things are not working right from the endometriosis because of how bad the IBS is. There is nothing that I can do or anything a doctor can do.

The side effects of the Depo Lupron leave something to be desired. Hot flashes, bowel problems, migraines, severe body aches and joint aches, weight gain, and depression. Sometimes I wonder what is better.. the pain or the side effects. Taking the medication doesn't guarantee that the end result will be what we want.

The only cure for endometriosis is a hysterectomy. So in good sound mind, the next one is it.

Please take the time to read the links that are on this blog. I hope this gives you a glimpse into me and our struggles and our triumphs.

Dear Depo Lupron... I hate you.

It hasn't even been a week and I am not sure if I can last 3 months let alone 6. I got my "first" round of Depo Lupron Monday. I have been nauseous, irritable and moody and emotional. And we haven't really even started yet.

So the back ground you ALLL want to read. When I was 16 we figured out that I was not "right." Most girls had started menstruating in Junior high and even elementary. But I was the lucky one. I was a junior in high school and NOTHING. We went to a doctor in Price and he gave me pills to start my period once a month. Are you kidding me? What girl would really want to HAVE a period so Junior year was kinda a joke. I wasn't going to make myself have a period. Senior year I had one periodically. Freshman year in college we got down to business. I found a doctor up here because when would have a period it was debilitating. I was SICK and couldn't get out of bed. I would throw up, cramp and the works.

So at 18, no real cycle, and debilitating symptoms we found Dr. Anderson. He is the jolliest man in the world. He is like a Santa Clause in a bow tie. Dr. A fixed my problem for the time and gave us some information about endometriosis. He "suspected" at that time that was what was causing my issues.

At 20 I was getting ready to go on a mission. And I was getting sicker. We opted to go the surgery route and my first Laproscopy was performed. He would take out what was there ( and there was stuff there) and sew me up and send me on my way. I felt SO much better.

I was on birth control for a while, then went on my mission. Things were going ok and until I got home the birth control worked. After a while we needed to switch it up a little and we started on continuous birth control. No period until my body broke through the birth control.

When the break through started it wouldn't stop. I was home from my misson a few months and our next step was depo Lupron. So I started my first round EVER. It was not so bad. I had horrible hot flashes. The biggest was the weight gain. But I had no choice and I knew I needed to do this.

I finished my first six months and moved to Logan. Not long the depo lupron wore off and after six months I needed a laproscopy. In October of 04 I had surgery. I was 24. By this time I am getting frustrated about this disease. It makes me sick A LOT.

In April 2005 I get pregnant. Something I was told would probably never happen. We were on NUVA ring as a continuous but some how we still got pregnant. Having a baby helped tremendously and it took about 2 years before I got sick again.

In 2007 we started another round of depo lupron. We would do this for 9 months before finding some large endometriomas, or masses of cells in my body that look like cysts or tumors. They were horrible and pretty painful. I was getting sicker. So April 2008 we did another surgery.

So a small side note: When I had Tyler the circumstances around his emergency delivery made my csection a mess. I had a transverse cut UP my uterus so I have scaring from that, and I also have some major scaring around the bikini cut that had to be redone as well. So my uterus and surrounding area is a big ball of adhesion's and scar tissue.

In the surgery in 2008, they found endometriosis and some really really bad adhesion's. Those adhesion's can be found on my bladder, bowels and my sciatic nerve. It makes my leg go numb. Then adding the regular endometriosis I am not a Happy person a few times a month.

They were able to remove a lot of them. But knowing that with a uterus still there it will always grow back. So we did another round of depo lupron after and I was able survive.

We were off birth control and "trying" to get pregnant for over six months and nothing. But I did have a cyst and another endomtrioma instead. We opted to not keep trying and get help first. Moving back to Utah let us come back to my doctor and he has jumped in full force.

The end of December I started bleeding through my birth control. It went away for a week and then it showed back up with a vengeance. It was not nice. So after 2 weeks of bleeding Dr Anderson didn't give me a choice. He said I have dysfunctional uterine bleeding. He needed to get it stopped and we needed to decide to have a baby or not to.

To get the dysfunctional bleeding to stop I have to take depo lupron. See the trend. Its HORRIBLE.

So that brings us to Monday. The shots came in and we are ready to go for 3 months. The side effects are certainly showing their face. I have less patience with my family. Dallas gets snapped at and since Tyler is not being Tyler I am going crazy.

The side effects are yucky. And for the first 3 weeks of the shot you feel really bad. Like REALLY bad. In fact you kinda feel pregnant. The weight gain comes and the snackies come. And then the hot flashes... Oh joy.

I am not ready to give up my uterus yet. I am not ready to let go of the dream I have. It is such a hard thing sometimes to know you are broken.

But man depo Lupron.. I still hate you!