Tuesday, August 16, 2011

School time, Bullies and Just Mean

When I was growing up school was always anticipated and we would get so excited for it to start. We spent the summer working to get our school clothes so we could buy what we wanted and we went shopping for new stuff. As we got older we got to go to the mall. I always thought that was the coolest thing. To know I got all my stuff from the mall. I still remember the dark blue guess jeans I HAD to have and I spent way to much money to have them.

Even when I went back to school some things never changed. I was never really popular ( I KNOW... SHUT THE FRONT DOOR!!) I had friends and I had some really great friends. I loved my high school group of friends and I adored my best friend Stephanie. ( who is due to have another sweet boy SOON!)

There were some kids that were teased HORRIBLY. Most of them had things "wrong" with them. One that I remember was teased to the point of cruel was John. I am pretty sure John passed away after high school. No one really knows for sure. But some mean stuff was done.

Last night I was watching the bachelor pad and the challenge was plain out CRUEL. They were throwing eggs at the people who they thought were the ugliest. It kind of made my skin crawl.

Add that to the man that decapitate his sons head and left it outside for the mom to find so she would " feel stupid" it really got my tears flowing. The little boy was mutilated. He also had cerebral palsy and his dad was "tired" of taking care of him.

I do not know what the future holds for us. But I am sending my sweet baby off to school. He is not " normal" by outside standards. He is "normal" for us. But he struggles. He has childish games he likes to play. He doesn't pretend play with others. He doesn't understand guns and war and Indians. Or start wars and start troopers. But he wants to belong. He wants to have friends. He wants to have other people be around him because he is him.

I guess I am asking if you are sending your kids off to school, teach them that there is different and that different isn't bad. That they have great things about them. To find the good and not the bad.


Madeleine said...

Great post Nancy. I know I struggle with the thought of my children being treated bad. Spencer tried to "belong" last year, but he didn't. Children are cruel and he ended up being friends with his teachers that actually understood and accepted him for who he was. Lets see how Kindergarten goes this year.
Tell Tyler hi from Spencer.

Grandma Labrum said...

Anyone who is lucky enough to really get to know Tyler knows what a hoot he is! Ruanne told me how she loved hearing him say, "Oh, hello, I'm so glad to see you!". What other 6 year old says that to an adult? I would love to have him in my class.

Mom to the Fab Four! said...


I found your blog through a friends blog quite awhile ago and have been reading it ever since. I very much enjoy reading about your fmaily and children. My youngest child has a neurological disorder. For right now his greatest "challenge" he faces is with his speech. He is almost 5 but his speech is now at a two year level. When he started preschool at 3 he was completely non-verbal and I was terrified. Not only was I worried he would need something or me and they wouldn't be able to figure it out, but also how the other children would treat him. I am happy to say, for him, that he had a wonderful two years of preschool. If fact last year one of the older boys in his class on his own took on the "job" of telling me every single day how Carter's day was. He would tell me if he ate his snack, if any kids bothered him, if he had been sad. I know this little 5 year old had no idea what a blessing that was to this mom. Now as we approach school again I worry again. This year it is a different school, different kids. The irony of this (now very long post) is that my oldest, who is very bright, in the talented and gifted progam, and is a very good althete, and is just generally a very well rounded boy, is the one who has been bullied relentlessly the last 2 years. That is the hardest, because we don't even know why! He was the one I thought I would never have to worry about and he is the target. I am beside myself this year, as he has to ride the bus 20 miles to where the district's middle school is with these same kids. I really hope Tyler has a great year and may we all work hard to teach our kids compassion and tolerance of those that are different than them!!

Shauna said...

What a great post. Thanks for spreading the word that "different" does not mean "less".