Of course you leave a little frustrated knowing that you will never be able to take care of your child and frustrated that the system works the way it does. If he was more severe or had a trach there is a waiver. If we were poor there would be no issue. But the fact that we are middle of the road, middle class people we get to chose between a place to live and things that will make his life better.
After the appointment we went right down to the Medicaid D office. It was almost closing time but we decided to sit there and fill out the stack of paper work to start off the application instead of having to turn it in to another office and forget to do something. So I sat there with Tyler and filled it out. After we were done it was taken right down to the neurosurgeons office to have his nurse fill out papers. By the time we got back home his nurse had called. She filled out what she could and decided that she wanted Dr. Gooch to fill it out. So she nicely took up it there and that was all we had heard.
Thanksgiving came and the high and rush of the new baby and then Christmas. Soon after the new year as we were working on the stroller thing and I kept calling the social worker. He would never return my calls so I was annoying and called every day at 2 and left a message. For ONE full week. Then I called our nurse coordinator at our peds office. I NEVER have used a coordinator. I have always done it myself. Clint, the nurse coordinator, laughed and said our doc said the same thing. She will never call you. She does it herself. BUT I broke down and got some help. He called a few times and finally I got some random person who said someone would call me back in 3 weeks. I was like um NO.
After a few 3 hour phone calls our dude called us back from PCMC. He said that they had been sending it to a random Nancy Brown somewhere in Lehi. We got them looking at our application and the address they have is our current address but they were sending it someplace else. Once we got that fixed we got some extra paper work in the mail.
Last night as we were going through insurance coverage and deciding how much we could afford on the extra stuff for flex spending and what not we filled out the PILES of paper work. They don't cater the forms to kids so you spend an hour filling out stuff that is Not applicable. Then they ask you to compare your kid to other normal kids and tell them what is not "normal" for your kid. I was like "Um really." Your asking for all our health records to send it to a board of people to determine if he has a need for disability and you want me to remind myself that we suck.
Sweet... Lets do that.
So 2 pages later as to what we suck at and I am about done mentally. Emotionally I was done from the day before. Tears start flowing. Then MORE tears because I realize as we get older and older, that me as the mom are making the adjustments of stuff we didn't want to be doing at 5 and other people are telling us he isn't welcome because of those things.
Today, I have lots of appreciation for the kid that I do have and a realization that his life and his well being are a balance and that if others who should love him can't made the adaptation then I will do them for him and do them alone. If we can't get the disability then we go homeless or sell a car. We make his life easy for him. We didn't want to be changing diapers at 5 and we didn't want to be ordering strollers or wheelchairs and braces and being told we can't do something that will make his life easier.
So 30 more days and we MIGHT find out that our spend down a month is outrageous because again.. those darn middle class folks just are rolling in the secret Dough and we start over in our quest.
If you have applied for Medicaid D what advice do you have? Was your spend down NUTS? Are we barking up the wrong tree?