Monday, October 27, 2008


I came home from work tonight, tired and so sick of MEAN people only to find my inbox full and comments on other sites about how rude I am and yet it was totally misunderstood.

I commented on a persons blog about how I didn't understand how they didn't qualify for a specific medicaid waiver. Their son is on a trach. This waiver is for technology (trach) dependant kids.

I was not in any way saying that I felt this mother had LIED to others about their dire need to make ends meet with a medically fragile child. I was in no way ASKING or DEMANDING that she "prove" to me or any one else. I was HONESTLY shocked that they didn't qualify. The state only requires that the child have no assets. As a three year old, he definitely doesn't have a porshe.

The comment was taken that I was being rude. I was not being rude. When I was attacked about my comment ( 23 comments later) I defended myself. I was also told I left "rude anonymous " comments on another women's blog. I did leave a comment on a blog AFTER she made fun of short buses and I spent the night in tears over it and I told her I thought it was rude. That was over 2 months ago. 2 months.

Yet she still bashed me on this other women's site.

I received 57 emails total of women telling me I was rude, I purposely hurt my child, didn't have enough faith to "cure" him of his ailments.

I was told I didn't understand how this family could possibly have medical debt.

I was told I was uncompassionate and a horrible person.

I cried.

I am NOT a mean person. I am not a rude person. I have learned to stand up for myself and fight for my child.

I try so hard to help as many people as I can.

I would NEVER ever purposely hurt Tyler. EVER. I did not cause the blunt trauma to his shunt to cause it to break. I did not WANT to have a sick child. I didn't do anything to try and have a child with a disability so that people would feel sorry for me. I do not hurt him. I LOVE him and only want what is best for him.

I don't care if you don't like me. But PLEASE don't' ever think that I would HONESTLY think a mother isn't doing all she can to help her child. If you really think that, then you don't know me.

Please don't talk about me to other people if you are not willing to privately email me and tell me your concerns even after I have emailed and apologized to you.



ThePreemie Experiment said...

Oh my gosh Nancy! I am so sorry this is happening to you.

YOU are NOT a mean person. If someone took your comment the wrong way, please don't let it define you.


I truly understand what it means to be misunderstood. I have cried many tears over what people have said about me. Then a long time friend will step in and remind me that I am NOT the person that some have made me out to be.

Please Nancy, do not for one moment listen to what the mean people say. You have been an incredible advocate for your child. You love him very much. It shows. His face is bright and he has so much peace in his precious face.

Sending many hugs to you today sweetie!!

Maloree said...

I really have nothing to say. I'm at a loss for words. I think you are great. I love your sense of humor about life. You are so honest. Sometimes that can be misunderstood.

Aunt Nicky said...

Nancy these women have nothing else to do then just writing on others blogs and looking for the negative. You do everything in your power to be the best mom for Tyler. I was there when the drs said that Tyler would not walk, talk or do anything.. Look at that little 3 yr old boy. He is walking, talking and enjoying life to the fullest of his capability. He loves you and he loves his dad. You did not ask him to be born early. You did everything you could for him NOT to be born like that. Those women didn't see what you and Dallas had to go through and I bet with their disabled children they have had to go through a lot. But you guys have NEVER got on your website ASKING for money! You have survived! You have made a GREAT life for Tyler and he loves you guys so much for it! Tyler loves you! Do not worry if those mean, cold-hearted ladies think you are a mean person. The only people that matter are your family. Does Tyler think you are a mean person? No! He will only go to his mom! He loves you so much! Those ladies can go ahead and email me my email is DO NOT MAKE MY SISTER HURT ANYMORE!!! Comment on my blog.. I can be rude back AND I WILL!!!

Chantel said...

Yikes! I hope things get better for you. Ty is lucky to have parents that take such good care of him :)

Denise said...

Nancy, You know honey I just adore you and Ty. I'm sorry people are are hateful and rude and have NO IDEA that you the only thing you want is for people to have the help and support they need. Look at what I went through with Jaxon. You supported me and have become my friend even after you were told mean things about me. So I understand and I am here for you. The rest of them can get a life. Big Hugs coming your way. You are a great mom and Ty is amazing. He would not be doing as well as he is without you! Remember that! :)

Jen said...

Nancy, I hate for anyone to ever get their feelings hurt. I'm sorry you're dealing with all this right now.

Kiera Rose said...

Hey Nancy, I don't know where these nasty people have posted all of these atrocities. I hope that they come to their senses, for the sake of their children at least, because unfortunately behaving badly is passed on to children. You are a wonderful mother and such a strong woman. I am very glad to know you. Hang in there.